Ongoing Journey - December 2024
It’s the thought that mattered
Went back to Irvine to visit parents this Thanksgiving, told them about the break up, and just like all parents, they immediately showed that they care.
Mother took me out to Breakfast, lunch and dinner, and sat without saying a word; Father sent me chinese poems that were helpful for ‘coping with myself’…
另外，那天有一句话爸爸记不住，现在找出来了。文章出自《察今》选自《吕氏春秋》。摘选句子是：故察己则可以知人，察今则可以知古，古今一也，人与我同耳。有道之士，贵以近知远，以今知古，以益所见，知所不见。故审堂下之阴，而知日月之行、阴阳之变；见瓶水之冰，而知天下之寒、鱼鳖之藏也。
TLDR, mom took me to eat, and dad sent me chinese poetry.
…
Of course either of them helped much, though thinking in another way, I felt better because of their precense instead of their actions.
Showing that you care is just as important as caring itself, remembered the interaction with Mihika back in 2022, she showed that she cared back when I was a student, one of the reason why I still look up to her, quite quite much.
How to write techinical article
Requested more project to work on with Foxconn the past two weeks, trying to immerse myself while dealing with life thoughts, joined the AWS conference at Vegas the second week.
Biggest takeaway was how much AI can help with everyday tasks now. I was there to help host a in person event with Shaoyang at the conference, and write a techinical article afterwards
I’ve done something similar before, producing an article after a panel, Shaoyang, with much more epxeirence + thoguhts, blew my mind how effenciet it is now
Here are the step:
- record audio during the panel on phone
- turn the audio into text through 飞书妙计, producing raw text
- feed the raw text into Claude with prompt, ask it to concise + make sense, get AI polished text
- human review, subbing in the correct names, terms, get human polished text
- repeat AI + human until one gets desired results
- read through the text and highlight and bold important parts, add in speaker name + intro, get first draft
- find photos and captions, use Claude to write intro, sub titles and summaries, get final draft
- run through Cluade one last time to check for misspelling and captizliatio error, add in chinese quotes, get release draft
We were able to finish the first 5 steps in 45 minutes, I was amazed how much AI can help / integrate into our lifes now.
On a side note, perhaps more of the learning comes from Shaoyang himself instead of the tools. Shaoyang is 35 and knows more about AI than I do, felt quite motivated on who I can be if kept a young mind and a brave heart.
Ownership of life
…Inevitably had more time to feel about the break up as Apple employees goes on breaks, and the factory projects slows down.
Looking deeper within, it’s a sense of, emptyness? Sitting in a room called myself, realizing all the furnitures has been removed, with me in the center of the room, not knowing what to do.
Mind immediately thought ‘oh this is a great time to redesign your room’, though remembered something Anita said back then. The context I no longer remember, but after hearing a sad story from my end, Anita paused for a little bit and said ‘allow yourself to be sad sometimes Sean’.
…
Moving forward is improtant, and been positive is also precious, though allow yourself to be down sometimes, it’s just like every other emotions I will experience in life.
So instead of thinking emptyness as a good or bad thing, I just want to sense it as it appears. Life is long and there are too many emotions for me to feel, so allow me to stay in here just for a little while.
Showing affections
One reflections I wrote towards break up - the 5 love languages are only the basic tools about showing affections, there are a common themes towards affections: 倾听，陪伴，解决问题.
Though realize the three are quite similar, thinking further, reminded of what dad said about, ‘和底层员工谈物质，和中层员工谈精神（生活），和高层员工谈愿景和使命’
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Well, unlike my dad, I’ve never ‘managed’ others before (and I doubt he ever managed 高层员工 lol), so using it only as a point of reference.
My current theory is, instead of showing affection bluntly, I would first need to know what stage I am with that person (materials, mind, or goals), and after that, think about what’s the best theme to approach the issue, and use one or some of the five language of love to project my affection towards them.
Stimulating Brains
Caught up with Ophelia while her work slows down, talked about the new life that we each get to adpot to.
I’ve been trying to get more works to fill up my life, for her it’s the opposite: she has too much work and are learning how to keep herself less overwhelmed.
Her secret method - guzheng lol.
…
Ophelia said that whenever she felt like her brain is overstimulated with work, when she can’t focus on other things, she would force herself to use her brain to do other hard things that she enjoys (in this case music), to let the brain shifts and eventually calm down to her own control.
It’s intersting right, instead of letting brain calm down by not using it (scrolling phones, watch tiktoks), Opehlia used the brain even more to eventually get itself back to control.
I wonder if the same situation applys to me, instead of pushing myself to do more work to NOT think about the relationsihp, I should think more about the relationship so that I can write down my thoughts, tam my mind, and close the chapter of the book.
…
There was a quote I read that said school in the US teaches everything except two things, taking breaks and finding happiness.
Good thing about break is that others who started working finally also came to a break, really happy that she is doing well.
Collecting Stamps vs. Watching Movies
Ever since I had the peopel tab I’ve been (very kindly) mocked as a collector, looking for exotic humans to add to my prestigous collections.
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I guess it’s somewhat true? Using Nancy’s term, I am always curious about the ‘bright people’, those who stands out among others. I am curious to learn what they were like back then, what their motivations are now, and who do they want to be in the future.
Thinking a bit deeper now, if these were my actions, I was never a collector. At none of the given moment did I ‘own’ the person, I simply take notes and let part of them sinking into my world.
So the concept of ‘binge watcher’ sounds more accurate than collector. I don’t own people, I simply listen to their stories, let part of them grow with me, and then bid them farewell, move closer to my own journey.
2024, 提着灯笼的盲僧
若能为后来的人举起一点微光，才算赎了年少轻狂。
In 2022 December I wrote a year in review, thought I would write something similar for this year.
Looking back this year things has been, chaotic? Transiting from school to work, this new identity I get to adpot to.
Out of the ivory tower and finally seen the world in full view, I was reminded of 盲人摸象。在学校里的我只了解了这个世界的万分之一，却认为这是世界的全部
it’s a humbling expeirence, 之前的我总想着一步到位，直到我发现生活充斥着混乱
The return offer I thought I will get, the capstone I thought I would do great, the love that I thought will last for, quite literally ever。
执着于自己为何是个盲人未免有些让人悲伤，我想，知道了这些的我，接下来应该如何和这个世界相处。
说回盲人摸象，我听过另外一个关于盲人的故事：盲僧提灯。
When others asked why the blind was holding the latern, he said: ‘so others can see the way.’
…
哪怕到最后可能也无法看清整个世界，我还是想做一位提着灯笼的盲僧。为身边的人举起一点微光， 然后温和，坚定地向前走。
少数的人知道该怎么走，超过一半的只会点着头
现在是新的以后也会旧，所以我不向左也不向右